You were the sugar in my Lipton tea,
You were my exaltation and delight
Like April blossoms on a cherry tree
You made new life from water and sun's light.

I came to you and played inside your shade
And in your soft and gentle aura bathed
I sang to you a starlight serenade
And underneath your leaves my soul misplaced.

I left it there, and it is there still
But I got lost and can find you no more,
Was it the inspiration? Was it will?
I'm shorn of everything that I adore.

I saw in you the energy of love
And everything that's holy and divine,
And I can't say "my darling one" enough:
You were more tasty than the vintage wine.

Now I will never hold your hands again
Or press my lips to you or touch your heart,
I'll write you many poems, all in vain,
And we are many, many miles apart,

My soul is lost - where will it reappear?
I cannot find it - will you help me please?
Will you remember me or shed a tear
As I am calling you among the trees?

You lift, alight, become airborne and fly
And lift my soul where it would never go,
And as I look at you and ask you why
You only answer me, I told you so.

But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
And maybe it is better off this way
For you, by now, have become a star
And I now dream of every yesterday.

By Ilya Shambat
https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambatpoetry

Ilya Shambat wrote:
>
> You were the sugar in my Lipton tea,
> You were my exaltation and delight
> Like April blossoms on a cherry tree
> You made new life from water and sun's light.

> I came to you and played inside your shade
> And in your soft and gentle aura bathed
> I sang to you a starlight serenade
> And underneath your leaves my soul misplaced.

> I left it there, and it is there still
> But I got lost and can find you no more,
> Was it the inspiration? Was it will?
> I'm shorn of everything that I adore.

> I saw in you the energy of love
> And everything that's holy and divine,
> And I can't say "my darling one" enough:
> You were more tasty than the vintage wine.

> Now I will never hold your hands again
> Or press my lips to you or touch your heart,
> I'll write you many poems, all in vain,
> And we are many, many miles apart,

> My soul is lost - where will it reappear?
> I cannot find it - will you help me please?
> Will you remember me or shed a tear
> As I am calling you among the trees?

> You lift, alight, become airborne and fly
> And lift my soul where it would never go,
> And as I look at you and ask you why
> You only answer me, I told you so.

> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> And maybe it is better off this way
> For you, by now, have become a star
> And I now dream of every yesterday.

> By Ilya Shambat
> https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambatpoetry

A lovely poem, I.S.

On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> You were the sugar in my Lipton tea,

"You're the Cream in My Coffee," w&m: Lew Brown/Ray Henderson/B.G. Desylva..

Product placement in poetry, Ilya?

> You were my exaltation and delight
> Like April blossoms on a cherry tree

Except for "exaltation," these two lines are excellent. Exaltation is too Biblical. It's also too one-sided (unless this is an unrequited love).

> You made new life from water and sun's light.

I highly doubt that she did any such thing... unless you were getting it on with a chrysanthemum.

> I came to you and played inside your shade
> And in your soft and gentle aura bathed[;] or [--] or [.]
> I sang to you a starlight serenade
> And underneath your leaves my soul misplaced.

The above inversion is acceptable... if the poem is set in or around 1600. If it's supposed to be set in modern times, you should state it naturally ("misplaced my soul") and find an appropriate rhyme to replace "bathed" with.
> I left it there, and it is there still

Awkward meter. I can figure out how to read it correctly, but it could be improved.

> But I got lost and can find you no more,

Hold on a minute! You misplaced your soul, and left it there, but you know more or less where it is, except that you got lost, and now you can't find the woman you're addressing?

That's a bit to complicated, don't you think? You can express the speaker's confusion without confusing the readers in the process.

> Was it the inspiration? Was it will?
> I'm shorn of everything that I adore.

Now you're babbling incoherently.

Was it "inspiration" that you got lost?

And who says "shorn" today -- unless they own a sheep?

> I saw in you the energy of love
> And everything that's holy and divine,
> And I can't say "my darling one" enough:
> You were more tasty than the vintage wine.

You've gone from incoherent babbling to inane, Hallmark card, pseudo-spiritual babbling.

You're implying that you normally see not only the "energy of love" (whateverthefuck that is), but that you also see all things Holy and Divine -- as your normal state of perception.

Are you a prophet?

And, FYI, connoisseurs of vintage wine would rather face a firing squad than describe it as "tasty."

Also, in English, we don't use the article "the" in this context. We say "You were more tasty than vintage wine."

> Now I will never hold your hands again
> Or press my lips to you or touch your heart,
> I'll write you many poems, all in vain,
> And we are many, many miles apart,

Clichéd twaddle.

> My soul is lost - where will it reappear?
> I cannot find it - will you help me please?

Why are you hyphenating these words?

Are you incapable of placing two hyphens together to create an em dash?

Are you as dense a jackass as our resident Donkey?

> Will you remember me or shed a tear
> As I am calling you among the trees?

The prophet has become a voice in the wilderness?

Shoot me now!

> You lift, alight, become airborne and fly

"Alight" means to land. She would not alight *after* having lifted you.

> And lift my soul where it would never go,
> And as I look at you and ask you why
> You only answer me, I told you so.

Except that you'd neglected to mention your conversation in the earlier stanzas, so your readers are left wondering WTF she'd told you.

> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar

Alas?

FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.

> And maybe it is better off this way
> For you, by now, have become a star
> And I now dream of every yesterday.

Why "by now"?

How long does it take to become a star? Was she one the fast-track to stardom?

And your narrator would not dream of "every yesterday," but of just plain old "yesterday."

"Every" would only be used if something were to follow. For instance: "And I now dream of every yesterday we spent together in the forest."

> By Ilya Shambat
> https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambatpoetry

Michael Pendragon wrote:

> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
>

>> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar

> Alas?

> FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.

Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?

https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ

"raising skin and bone armies but alas,
no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto

https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
"but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto

???

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 8:58:39 PM UTC-4, vhug...@gmail.com wrote:
> Michael Pendragon wrote:
>
> > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> >
>
> >> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
>
> > Alas?
>
> > FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
>
> "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> ???

Good find.

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 8:58:39 PM UTC-4, vhug...@gmail.com wrote:
> Michael Pendragon wrote:
>
> > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> >
>
> >> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
>
> > Alas?
>
> > FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
>
> "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> ???

In the first poem, Jim is using the archaism to play off of the Biblical reference that precedes it: "we go forth and multiply
raising skin and bone armies but alas..."

In the second, he's using it to foreshadow a reference to the Constitution, however, I don't think that it works quite as well there: "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination
which I am allowed under the Constitution."

In both instances, the word is used non-melodramatically and doesn't draw attention to itself.

Mind you, I'm not saying that I approve of Jim's word choice -- however, if one does opt to use an archaism, Jim's use does not prove detrimental to his verse.

Zod wrote:

> Michael Pendragon wrote:

>> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
>>

>>> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar

>> Alas?

>> FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.

> Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?

> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ

> "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto

> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto

> ???

Now, wait for it, as Pendragon tries to defend Senetto's latest fuck up.

🙂

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:24:14 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> Zod wrote:
>
> > Michael Pendragon wrote:
>
> >> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> >>
> >>> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> >> Alas?
>
> >> FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
>
>
> > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
>
> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
>
> > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> > ???
> Now, wait for it, as Pendragon tries to defend Senetto's latest fuck up.
>
> 🙂

Alas, Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face, thou art bloated and in need of a deep swipe of Prep H applied by the greased finger
of Tainted Fish Face. To dream, nay pray thy pants will drop and the itch be gone.

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:34:03 PM UTC-4, blackpo...@aol.com wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:24:14 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > Zod wrote:
> >
> > > Michael Pendragon wrote:
> >
> > >> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > >>
> > >>> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > >> Alas?
> >
> > >> FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> >
> >
> > > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> >
> > > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > > ???
> > Now, wait for it, as Pendragon tries to defend Senetto's latest fuck up..
> >
> >
> Alas, Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face, thou art bloated and in need of a deep swipe of Prep H applied by the greased finger
> of Tainted Fish Face. To dream, nay pray thy pants will drop and the itch be gone.

So Jim Senetto, the old fart, displays his knowledge of being butt hurt.

Why am I not surprised?

🙂

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:37:32 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:34:03 PM UTC-4, blackpo...@aol.com wrote:
> > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:24:14 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > > Zod wrote:
> > >
> > > > Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > >
> > > >> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > > >>
> > > >>> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > > >> Alas?
> > >
> > > >> FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> > >
> > >
> > > > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> > >
> > > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> > >
> > > > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > > > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > > > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > > ???
> > > Now, wait for it, as Pendragon tries to defend Senetto's latest fuck up.
> > >
> > >
> > Alas, Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face, thou art bloated and in need of a deep swipe of Prep H applied by the greased finger
> > of Tainted Fish Face. To dream, nay pray thy pants will drop and the itch be gone.
> So Jim Senetto, the old fart, displays his knowledge of being butt hurt.
>
> Why am I not surprised?
>
> 🙂

She put a finger to my hole, "What's good for the goose is good for the Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face"

Begone stinky ass or it's the green-haired gum head boys I shall call to your needs.

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:49:25 PM UTC-4, blackpo...@aol.com wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:37:32 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:34:03 PM UTC-4, blackpo...@aol.com wrote:
> > > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:24:14 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > > > Zod wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > > >
> > > > >> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > > > >>
> > > > >>> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > > > >> Alas?
> > > >
> > > > >> FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> > > >
> > > > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> > > >
> > > > > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > > > > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > > > > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > > ???
> > > > Now, wait for it, as Pendragon tries to defend Senetto's latest fuck up.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > Alas, Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face, thou art bloated and in need of a deep swipe of Prep H applied by the greased finger
> > > of Tainted Fish Face. To dream, nay pray thy pants will drop and the itch be gone.
> > So Jim Senetto, the old fart, displays his knowledge of being butt hurt..
> >
> > Why am I not surprised?
> >
> > 🙂
> She put a finger to my hole, "What's good for the goose is good for the Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face"
>
> Begone stinky ass or it's the green-haired gum head boys I shall call to your needs.

Alas, you're one feeble minded fool, Senetto.

🙂

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:59:34 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:49:25 PM UTC-4, blackpo...@aol.com wrote:
> > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:37:32 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:34:03 PM UTC-4, blackpo...@aol.com wrote:
> > > > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:24:14 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > > > > Zod wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > > Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > >> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > > > > >>
> > > > > >>> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > > > > >> Alas?
> > > > >
> > > > > >> FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> > > > >
> > > > > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> > > > >
> > > > > > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > > > > > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > > > > > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > > ???
> > > > > Now, wait for it, as Pendragon tries to defend Senetto's latest fuck up.
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > Alas, Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face, thou art bloated and in need of a deep swipe of Prep H applied by the greased finger
> > > > of Tainted Fish Face. To dream, nay pray thy pants will drop and the itch be gone.
> > > So Jim Senetto, the old fart, displays his knowledge of being butt hurt.
> > >
> > > Why am I not surprised?
> > >
> > > 🙂
> > She put a finger to my hole, "What's good for the goose is good for the Swollen Hairy Hemorrhoid Face"
> >
> > Begone stinky ass or it's the green-haired gum head boys I shall call to your needs.
> Alas, you're one feeble minded fool, Senetto.

At least he doesn't think Spenser's poetry is reminiscent of Monty Python.

Michael Pendragon
"No doubt about it, Edmund Spenser would fit in very well in the worlds of Terry Gilliam and Monty Python."
-- Will Dockery, demonstrating why he never made it through the 8th grade.

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 8:58:39 PM UTC-4, vhug...@gmail.com wrote:
> Michael Pendragon wrote:
>
> > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> >
>
> >> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
>
> > Alas?
>
> > FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?

That's the quote of the day

🙂

> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
>
> "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> ???

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 11:35:19 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 8:58:39 PM UTC-4, vhug...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Michael Pendragon wrote:
> >
> > > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > >
> >
> > >> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> >
> > > Alas?
> >
> > > FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> That's the quote of the day

What part of "unless they're writing a period poem" are you failing to understand, Donkey?

Jim was using the archaism to evoke the Bible and the Constitution -- both of which were mention in the same sentences in each of his poems. That is a poetically valid use of an archaism.

I used to think that you were only playing stupid (back in the days when you were dancing like a monkey to PJR, Cujo, and Aratzio's tunes), but I've come to realize that, like Bottom's dream, your stupidity is bottomless.

> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> >
> > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > ???

Michael Pendragon
"I'd think so, but never underestimate the stupidity of a troll."
-- Will Dockery, a man who should never be underestimated.

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:36:23 PM UTC, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> Will Dockery wrote:
> > Zod wrote:
>
> > Alas
>
> > "FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs." -Michael Pendragon
>
>
> Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
>
> "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

<Whining snipped>

Because you're a shit eating little monkey, Pendragon.

You're always going to defend your fellow trolls and thugs.

HTH and HAND.

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 11:57:48 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:36:23 PM UTC, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > Will Dockery wrote:
> > > Zod wrote:
> >
> > > Alas
> >
> > > "FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs." -Michael Pendragon
> >
> >
> > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> >
> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> >
> > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>
> <Whining snipped>
>
> Because you're a shit eating little monkey, Pendragon.
>
> You're always going to defend your fellow trolls and thugs.

I'm not defending anyone, Donkey. I'm discussing he legitimate uses of archaisms in poetry.

On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 12:19:03 AM UTC-4, michaelmalef...@gmail.com wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 11:57:48 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:36:23 PM UTC, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > > Will Dockery wrote:
> > > > Zod wrote:
> > >
> > > > Alas
> > >
> > > > "FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs." -Michael Pendragon
> > >
> > >
> > > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> > >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> > >
> > > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> >
> > <Whining snipped>
> >
> > Because you're a shit eating little monkey, Pendragon.
> >
> > You're always going to defend your fellow trolls and thugs.
> I'm not defending anyone

Why do you lie so much, Pendragon, you shit spewing little monkey?

🙂

On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 12:19:03 AM UTC-4, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 11:57:48 PM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 10:36:23 PM UTC, Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > > Will Dockery wrote:
> > > > Zod wrote:
> > >
> > > > Alas
> > >
> > > > "FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs." -Michael Pendragon
> > >
> > >
> > > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> > >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> > >
> > > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
> >
> > <Whining snipped>
> >
> > Because you're a shit eating little monkey, Pendragon.
> >
> > You're always going to defend your fellow trolls and thugs.
>
> I'm not defending anyone, Donkey. I'm discussing he legitimate uses of archaisms in poetry.

Upon which subject, I shall resume.

A poem's language should reflect the spoken language of the period in which it was written and/or set. For instance, a poem set in Medieval England, should include archaic words, phrases, and writing styles that evoke those associated with Medieval English poems. The poem, however, should still be readily understandable to modern readers, so while it utilizes some archaic words and phrases, it include modern elements as well.

Another exception would be when the words are used to convey the speaker's state of mind. Hyperbole, inversion, archaism, ornate speech, etc., can "betray" the speaker as unrealistically romantic, sycophantic, pretentious, or even foolish. This should, however, be limited to poems wherein the speaker's misperceptions are responsible for the sentiments expressed.

One of the reasons why Robert Frost's poetry has been popular for the past century is that his use of language is similar to that which we speak in everyday life. Poetry is a heightened form of language that incorporates elements (rhyme, meter, alliteration, etc.) that are not common to everyday speech. The best poetry utilizes those elements in such a way that they rarely draw attention to themselves.

Words like "alas," "alack," "forsooth," "verily," etc., are both archaic and, in today's poetry, anachronistic, and should generally be avoided. Amateur poets will often throw them in, because they have seen them in Elizabethan poetry and think that poetry always uses such words. They follow a similar course regarding the use of inversions. Not only do these words and inversions sound "phony" in modern poetry (even in rhymed modern poetry), but they are also commonly used as filler or to accommodate the meter or rhyme.

My test for poetic language is to write the line out in sentence form and then read it aloud. If it sounds ridiculous in the context of everyday speech, it sounds every bit as ridiculous in your poem.

On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 8:58:39 PM UTC-4, vhug...@gmail.com wrote:
> Michael Pendragon wrote:
>
> > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> >
>
> >> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
>
> > Alas?
>
> > FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
>
> "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
>
>
> ???

You nailed it.

🙂

On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 10:10:33 AM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 8:58:39 PM UTC-4, vhug...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Michael Pendragon wrote:
> >
> > > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > >
> >
> > >> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> >
> > > Alas?
> >
> > > FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> >
> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> >
> > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> >
> >
> > ???
> You nailed it.

Hush, Donkey. The grownups are having a discussion.

Michael Pendragon
"Will Dockery is well-spoken for an illiterate, sub-moronic pissbum."
-- Ahmos Zu-Bolton, Pegasus: The Carver High Literary Journal, May 1976

On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 12:09:37 PM UTC-4, cocodeso...@gmail.com wrote:
> On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 10:10:33 AM UTC-4, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Thursday, September 8, 2022 at 8:58:39 PM UTC-4, vhug...@gmail.com wrote:
> > > Michael Pendragon wrote:
> > >
> > > > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 10:48:41 PM UTC-4, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > > >
> > >
> > > >> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > >
> > > > Alas?
> > >
> > > > FYI: Poets who use words like a "alas" (unless they're writing a period poem) are laughed at as crass, unlettered amateur, poseurs.
> > > Like Jim Senetto does quite often..?
> > >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/zVggf29mnVA/m/hnteHXlwAwAJ
> > >
> > > "raising skin and bone armies but alas,
> > > no match to that which stands firm.." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > https://groups.google.com/g/alt.arts.poetry.comments/c/9_hgzctMDP0/m/zjS7YSCKCAAJ
> > > "but alas, I don’t have enough ammunition to rid all, just imagination..." -Jim Senetto
> > >
> > >
> > > ???
> > You nailed it.
> Hush,

Says Michael Pendragon, the shit eating little monkey.

🙂

Donkey. The grownups are having a discussion.
>
> Michael Pendragon
> "Will Dockery is well-spoken for an illiterate, sub-moronic pissbum."
> -- Forgery of Ahmos Zu-Bolton by Michael Pendragon noted, Pegasus: The Carver High Literary Journal, May 1976

On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 7:48:41 PM UTC-7, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> You were the sugar in my Lipton tea,
> You were my exaltation and delight
> Like April blossoms on a cherry tree
> You made new life from water and sun's light.
>
> I came to you and played inside your shade
> And in your soft and gentle aura bathed
> I sang to you a starlight serenade
> And underneath your leaves my soul misplaced.
>
> I left it there, and it is there still
> But I got lost and can find you no more,
> Was it the inspiration? Was it will?
> I'm shorn of everything that I adore.
>
> I saw in you the energy of love
> And everything that's holy and divine,
> And I can't say "my darling one" enough:
> You were more tasty than the vintage wine.
>
> Now I will never hold your hands again
> Or press my lips to you or touch your heart,
> I'll write you many poems, all in vain,
> And we are many, many miles apart,
>
> My soul is lost - where will it reappear?
> I cannot find it - will you help me please?
> Will you remember me or shed a tear
> As I am calling you among the trees?
>
> You lift, alight, become airborne and fly
> And lift my soul where it would never go,
> And as I look at you and ask you why
> You only answer me, I told you so.
>
> But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> And maybe it is better off this way
> For you, by now, have become a star
> And I now dream of every yesterday.
>
> By Ilya Shambat
> https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambatpoetry

i just read the beginning of this earlier, my only poem for today, and stopped, cuz of lipton tea, cuz it reminds of stuff, lots of stuff, and then a follow-up coincidence!!!! (i mean, it's weird....i was just, well, i can't give it away....is that weird that all my stories are like meaningless coincidences, my doctor said they were just cool stories, i mean, i don't think anybody is talking to me or anything, it's sorta just like the twilight zone with the builders, for each planned minute of your life, or like when bob sings, it all falls there so perfectly, it all seems so well-timed) and now, i had decided, i'm so tired, i'm just going to rest today (until i "go" to shabbat), and i'm all sick of the tv stuff, queen, then i found this old tv show, somehow it was on, hazel, interesting....re: bob? anyway, so i started going through the menu, so sick of the levity or phony intense drama, and i just felt like i want to be *real*, and i see chariots of fire is still on, then sophie's choice, sort of like, yeah, i know this, reality, like when i was a kid....and i put it on....but i probably won't stick out sophie's choice, i just can't handle it anymore, i'm kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place in my life. :-////, anyway, and boom, the first thing i see is LIPTON TEA as a sponsor on the race track, for the two runners. :-) (i mean, if i told you the stuff i can't tell you, you'd go WOW!!!)

On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 12:56:05 PM UTC-4, Rachel wrote:
> On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 7:48:41 PM UTC-7, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
>
> > You were the sugar in my Lipton tea,
> > You were my exaltation and delight
> > Like April blossoms on a cherry tree
> > You made new life from water and sun's light.
> >
> > I came to you and played inside your shade
> > And in your soft and gentle aura bathed
> > I sang to you a starlight serenade
> > And underneath your leaves my soul misplaced.
> >
> > I left it there, and it is there still
> > But I got lost and can find you no more,
> > Was it the inspiration? Was it will?
> > I'm shorn of everything that I adore.
> >
> > I saw in you the energy of love
> > And everything that's holy and divine,
> > And I can't say "my darling one" enough:
> > You were more tasty than the vintage wine.
> >
> > Now I will never hold your hands again
> > Or press my lips to you or touch your heart,
> > I'll write you many poems, all in vain,
> > And we are many, many miles apart,
> >
> > My soul is lost - where will it reappear?
> > I cannot find it - will you help me please?
> > Will you remember me or shed a tear
> > As I am calling you among the trees?
> >
> > You lift, alight, become airborne and fly
> > And lift my soul where it would never go,
> > And as I look at you and ask you why
> > You only answer me, I told you so.
> >
> > But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > And maybe it is better off this way
> > For you, by now, have become a star
> > And I now dream of every yesterday.
> >
> > By Ilya Shambat
> > https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambatpoetry
> i just read the beginning of this earlier, my only poem for today, and stopped, cuz of lipton tea, cuz it reminds of stuff, lots of stuff, and then a follow-up coincidence!!!! (i mean, it's weird....i was just, well, i can't give it away....is that weird that all my stories are like meaningless coincidences, my doctor said they were just cool stories, i mean, i don't think anybody is talking to me or anything, it's sorta just like the twilight zone with the builders, for each planned minute of your life, or like when bob sings, it all falls there so perfectly, it all seems so well-timed) and now, i had decided, i'm so tired, i'm just going to rest today (until i "go" to shabbat), and i'm all sick of the tv stuff, queen, then i found this old tv show, somehow it was on, hazel, interesting....re: bob? anyway, so i started going through the menu, so sick of the levity or phony intense drama, and i just felt like i want to be *real*, and i see chariots of fire is still on, then sophie's choice, sort of like, yeah, i know this, reality, like when i was a kid....and i put it on....but i probably won't stick out sophie's choice, i just can't handle it anymore, i'm kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place in my life. :-////, anyway, and boom, the first thing i see is LIPTON TEA as a sponsor on the race track, for the two runners. :-) (i mean, if i told you the stuff i can't tell you, you'd go WOW!!!)

Good afternoon, Rachel.

🙂

On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 11:54:38 AM UTC-7, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 12:56:05 PM UTC-4, Rachel wrote:
> > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 7:48:41 PM UTC-7, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> >
> > > You were the sugar in my Lipton tea,
> > > You were my exaltation and delight
> > > Like April blossoms on a cherry tree
> > > You made new life from water and sun's light.
> > >
> > > I came to you and played inside your shade
> > > And in your soft and gentle aura bathed
> > > I sang to you a starlight serenade
> > > And underneath your leaves my soul misplaced.
> > >
> > > I left it there, and it is there still
> > > But I got lost and can find you no more,
> > > Was it the inspiration? Was it will?
> > > I'm shorn of everything that I adore.
> > >
> > > I saw in you the energy of love
> > > And everything that's holy and divine,
> > > And I can't say "my darling one" enough:
> > > You were more tasty than the vintage wine.
> > >
> > > Now I will never hold your hands again
> > > Or press my lips to you or touch your heart,
> > > I'll write you many poems, all in vain,
> > > And we are many, many miles apart,
> > >
> > > My soul is lost - where will it reappear?
> > > I cannot find it - will you help me please?
> > > Will you remember me or shed a tear
> > > As I am calling you among the trees?
> > >
> > > You lift, alight, become airborne and fly
> > > And lift my soul where it would never go,
> > > And as I look at you and ask you why
> > > You only answer me, I told you so.
> > >
> > > But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > > And maybe it is better off this way
> > > For you, by now, have become a star
> > > And I now dream of every yesterday.
> > >
> > > By Ilya Shambat
> > > https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambatpoetry
> > i just read the beginning of this earlier, my only poem for today, and stopped, cuz of lipton tea, cuz it reminds of stuff, lots of stuff, and then a follow-up coincidence!!!! (i mean, it's weird....i was just, well, i can't give it away....is that weird that all my stories are like meaningless coincidences, my doctor said they were just cool stories, i mean, i don't think anybody is talking to me or anything, it's sorta just like the twilight zone with the builders, for each planned minute of your life, or like when bob sings, it all falls there so perfectly, it all seems so well-timed) and now, i had decided, i'm so tired, i'm just going to rest today (until i "go" to shabbat), and i'm all sick of the tv stuff, queen, then i found this old tv show, somehow it was on, hazel, interesting....re: bob? anyway, so i started going through the menu, so sick of the levity or phony intense drama, and i just felt like i want to be *real*, and i see chariots of fire is still on, then sophie's choice, sort of like, yeah, i know this, reality, like when i was a kid....and i put it on....but i probably won't stick out sophie's choice, i just can't handle it anymore, i'm kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place in my life. :-////, anyway, and boom, the first thing i see is LIPTON TEA as a sponsor on the race track, for the two runners. :-) (i mean, if i told you the stuff i can't tell you, you'd go WOW!!!)
> Good afternoon, Rachel.
>
> 🙂

i wish... :(

On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 2:56:35 PM UTC-4, Rachel wrote:
> On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 11:54:38 AM UTC-7, Will Dockery wrote:
> > On Friday, September 9, 2022 at 12:56:05 PM UTC-4, Rachel wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, August 31, 2022 at 7:48:41 PM UTC-7, ibsh...@gmail.com wrote:
> > >
> > > > You were the sugar in my Lipton tea,
> > > > You were my exaltation and delight
> > > > Like April blossoms on a cherry tree
> > > > You made new life from water and sun's light.
> > > >
> > > > I came to you and played inside your shade
> > > > And in your soft and gentle aura bathed
> > > > I sang to you a starlight serenade
> > > > And underneath your leaves my soul misplaced.
> > > >
> > > > I left it there, and it is there still
> > > > But I got lost and can find you no more,
> > > > Was it the inspiration? Was it will?
> > > > I'm shorn of everything that I adore.
> > > >
> > > > I saw in you the energy of love
> > > > And everything that's holy and divine,
> > > > And I can't say "my darling one" enough:
> > > > You were more tasty than the vintage wine.
> > > >
> > > > Now I will never hold your hands again
> > > > Or press my lips to you or touch your heart,
> > > > I'll write you many poems, all in vain,
> > > > And we are many, many miles apart,
> > > >
> > > > My soul is lost - where will it reappear?
> > > > I cannot find it - will you help me please?
> > > > Will you remember me or shed a tear
> > > > As I am calling you among the trees?
> > > >
> > > > You lift, alight, become airborne and fly
> > > > And lift my soul where it would never go,
> > > > And as I look at you and ask you why
> > > > You only answer me, I told you so.
> > > >
> > > > But what, alas? I'm gazing from afar
> > > > And maybe it is better off this way
> > > > For you, by now, have become a star
> > > > And I now dream of every yesterday.
> > > >
> > > > By Ilya Shambat
> > > > https://sites.google.com/site/ibshambatpoetry
> > > i just read the beginning of this earlier, my only poem for today, and stopped, cuz of lipton tea, cuz it reminds of stuff, lots of stuff, and then a follow-up coincidence!!!! (i mean, it's weird....i was just, well, i can't give it away....is that weird that all my stories are like meaningless coincidences, my doctor said they were just cool stories, i mean, i don't think anybody is talking to me or anything, it's sorta just like the twilight zone with the builders, for each planned minute of your life, or like when bob sings, it all falls there so perfectly, it all seems so well-timed) and now, i had decided, i'm so tired, i'm just going to rest today (until i "go" to shabbat), and i'm all sick of the tv stuff, queen, then i found this old tv show, somehow it was on, hazel, interesting....re: bob? anyway, so i started going through the menu, so sick of the levity or phony intense drama, and i just felt like i want to be *real*, and i see chariots of fire is still on, then sophie's choice, sort of like, yeah, i know this, reality, like when i was a kid....and i put it on....but i probably won't stick out sophie's choice, i just can't handle it anymore, i'm kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place in my life. :-////, anyway, and boom, the first thing i see is LIPTON TEA as a sponsor on the race track, for the two runners. :-) (i mean, if i told you the stuff i can't tell you, you'd go WOW!!!)
> > Good afternoon, Rachel.
> >
> > 🙂
> i wish... :(

Sorry.

😥